I've been putting off seeing my doctor for ages. Why? I'm afraid. Afraid that they won't be able to help me. That they'll fob me off with a 'just keep doing what you're doing' response. Anxious that they'll want to change my medication. Again. I've had a difficult year with medical professionals. Long story short, [...]
TW: Suicidal ideation The period between 2003 - 2013 was a whirlwind of changes for me. The catalyst for these changes came from my online world. A place that held me safely in it’s hands. It was a place without judgement and a community full of compassionate individuals. I could feel the warmth and [...]
It is more than just being happy Mania makes me feel euphoricMania makes me feel constantly 'on' and readyMania makes me feel a constant sense of anticipationSufferers all have slightly different periods of hypomania and mania. An episode could last daysAn episode could last weeksA hypomanic or manic episode could last monthsMania is not always [...]
The word recovery means very different things to different people. The word is problematic and can ultimately be damaging. When people talk about recovery it marginalises those that can't. Some people use the word to describe the process and not an actual milestone. Some see it as having a positive outlook, that they see as [...]
A couple of weeks ago I had what's called a mixed episode of bipolar disorder. What this means is that I was experiencing mania (the highs) and depression in very short succession, to the point that I felt both at the same time. In this post I wanted to write an account of what it [...]
I've found myself in a a strange situation. It's one I haven't experienced for years. It's called stability. My life has been full of desperate lows and extreme highs and not much in between. It's been like this for over a decade. It's true I have had periods of stability, but usually they only last [...]
