Mania is…

RENOIR

 

Running into the garden armed with a super soaker and naked, shouting ‘you little fucker’ at a cat

Screaming ‘fuck you, you twat’ at the top of my lungs at a bar manager.

Refusing money to pay the heating bill when living in freezing temperatures.

Laughing uncontrollably and jumping on the bed for no reason.

Putting a trip to Japan on the credit card.

Getting angry at the smallest annoyance and shouting, swearing, stamping my feet for hours on end.

Talking incessantly at a crazily fast pace.

Loudly explaining how to properly shank somebody waving around a steak knife in a busy restaurant.

Walking home from town alone in the early hours of the morning.

Sleeping less than 3 hours a night.

Confronting complete strangers when they are rude.

Working out obsessively.

Driving recklessly; tailgating, driving too fast and speeding around country roads and crashing into other cars.

Wanting sex at four in the morning.

A mind bursting with creative ideas.

Having ridiculously high expectations of myself, and others around me.

Hearing voices that fill me with confidence and excitement.

Ranting angrily at someone, or myself, relentlessly for hours on end. For more about anger, read Anger and Bipolar

Making family and friends cry when I make rude inappropriate statements about them.

Ridiculing people I love in public.

Deliberately being belligerent and combative to start an argument.

Growling at work, and looking surprised when people notice.

Composing strange disturbing noises and shouting them in people’s ears.

A feeling that my mind is one moment buzzing with excitement and happiness and the next with anger and animosity. Bipolar: The difference between feeling good and mania

An intense need to scream; with happiness or anger.

A ‘twinkle’ I see in my eyes when I look back at photos. Some of these photos are in my post Capturing Moods: A Bipolar Picture Diary

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5 Comments

  1. Mindfump February 20, 2017 / 4:16 pm

    That is me right now

  2. Ela Kaimo February 21, 2017 / 12:29 am

    I can’t imagine how it’s like to live with such ups and downs. Keep strong, we’re rooting for you. And it’s great that you’re using your blog as a platform to educate people about this.

    • Katie Conibear February 21, 2017 / 1:29 pm

      Thank you. The realities of mania aren’t always palatable, but it’s important to talk about them.

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